Sometimes the black square that we use to delete what we don’t like becomes the painting
Sometimes we name the painting deleted
Sometimes we change the name
Sometimes in order to burn down white we burn down black
Sometimes we go to bed without talking about things that may keep us up until two
Sometimes we need to leave the city before we collect the oil
Sometimes we give our friends what hurts us as a gift
Sometimes we can see where we’ve been fucking with people
Sometimes we don’t know where it has been taking place.
Sometimes the next stretch looks like it’s going to take a while
Sometimes the frisbee curves around toward out stillness and opens the doorstep
Sometimes we are disappointed when we don’t do frisbee right
Sometimes we walk our friend out to see what kind of car they’re driving.
Sometimes we think that we’re better than white people
Sometimes we hide in a group
Sometimes the lint just won’t stop coming
Sometimes we work so hard for so long that we fry or adrenal glands and we have to walk in the back door because facing people is just too much to take
Sometimes when we wake up we can’t get out of bed
Sometimes feelings last for weeks
Sometimes all the cars slowly climb the hill together at sunset between the folded mountains.
Sometimes we are so open that our skin feels like knives made out of tears
Sometimes our father drives us across the country and tells us that we have a half brother and makes the land become a map of entangled love unraveling toward the ocean
Sometimes somewhere near Utah black mountains in the curves reveal the fear in our father we were unaware was possible
Sometimes there aren’t guardrails where we think there should be guard rails and for a moment the freedom of death is alive and intoxicating at the moment we realize there are so many lethal objects in a kitchen
Sometimes our ears pop in the desert
Sometimes night darkness begins to cover sign 13 B
Sometimes we could give this all up
Sometimes we catch a glimpse of the thing that we’ve been holding on so tightly to.
Sometimes the feeling fades as it remains.
Sometimes our phones listen to us more deeply than we listen to ourselves
Sometimes our laptop sees us in ways that we have never seen ourselves
Sometimes Black people have 1 billion identities
Sometimes here’s night
Sometimes we're not accessible clear or warranted
Sometimes we are they
Sometimes we are what they say
Sometimes we are what they say about us especially when we are they who say it
Sometimes it’s just too much to see
Sometimes the thin slice of the widespreading desert sunset fades into night and makes us hungry for all of life
Sometimes it’s hard for us to admit that we feel like we may not make it to the end
Sometimes we drive in the desert slowly sliding open like a snake at night
Sometimes it’s just us and truck drivers alone on the road together in the last of the sunset is behind you and the night is in front of you and it is filled with only a plane
Sometimes the maintenance required is on
Sometimes we wear a suit to better hear the spirit world
Sometimes our search for a language of love leads us into an unintelligible discomfort.